Motherhood: Why We Need to Stop Bashing One Another

We get one life, right? Well, one on planet Earth. The one life we do get should be lived as best as we possibly can. Life can be hard – even more so for some. Life deals us a hand but it’s how we react to that hand is what shapes the future.

I’ve always been called an optimist. I’d like to think we could all live in a world of love and harmony because life really is too short to be negative, especially to one another. Which leads me onto motherhood! Motherhood is a personal journey, no two children are the same, no one method works for all. Motherhood is like the yellow brick road, it’s full of optimism, hope, wonder and enjoyment but on the way, you will meet people that will teach you lessons in life and there will be times you are challenged, you will question yourself and often you’ll have your own personal witch (or two) to feed your fears.

Motherhood: Why We Need to Stop Bashing One Another

We ALL want to be the best mother we possibly can. We all want what is best for our children and for ourselves. So why is it, that some are insistent on putting others down? Why is it that some feel more superior than others? What makes one person better at motherhood than the next? Who is the judge? Who is the one scoring the points? Sadly, it’s ourselves. We torcher ourselves into being this media perfect mother.

Our subconscious works hard at gathering information we see on social media and we set unachievable benchmarks on what motherhood is supposed to look like. I’m not sure about you, but I tend to look like a deranged dog chasing its tail striving and trying to reach the holy grail of motherhood.  Well I am here to tell you that all that media fuelled nonsense isn’t what matters. What matters is YOUR perception of perfection.

I am sure there will be many responses to yesterday’s Daily Fail article and I don’t really want to give it any attention – it’s not worthy of my time. But if you happened to have read it and came away feeling deflated because you felt like a sub-standard mum because you weren’t living up to an expectation of someone’s opinion (because that’s all it is) then please know this… Within the online mum community, there was retaliation, there was an army of mums all unifying together against this person. Her article did touch nerves and she did upset a lot of people because she had made it so personal.

A child needs love. A child needs safety. A child needs food (even if it is chips and nuggets) so what? who cares? Obviously, if it was three times a day and a day without fruit and veg then that wouldn’t be good but we are talking about moderation. It’s OK to allow your child to eat to the odd bit of processed food. I do it… the girls eat an array of foods and guess what – they eat meat! Yes, I am vegan – they aren’t (that’s a post for another day). They eat healthily 80% of the time. They eat chocolate, biscuits, vegan nuggets, chips and meat. They also eat LOADS of fruit, veg, pulses, grains, seeds and nuts.

Occasionally I have been known to grab a G&T at 5 pm on a Friday and fed them cereal because I’ve done a stint of 5 days solid of poorly children, I’ve also been unwell and I’ve had no help because I am a single mum. We do what we must do but guess what? I love my children so much so my heart aches. They are my world and I want them to have the best lives possible.

We all need to STOP bashing one another. We are all doing the same job. Some have it harder than others for whatever reason. If you see a mum that’s finding it hard – then talk to her, offer some support. Don’t bash her down. We need to lift each other up and really mean it, don’t just say it.

We are ALL part of the same club – some form their own groups/cliques and others like me, just want everyone to get on and there is nothing wrong with that. It does not make you less of a person.

My final words and rules to live by:

Stop judging

Be happy for others success

Be kind always

Concentrate on your own life more rather than someone else’s

Motherhood is not an easy ride and that’s OK – it’s not meant to be. You are raising humans!

Motherhood is beautiful in EVERY way

Mama, you’ve got this!

Motherhood: Why We Need to Stop Bashing One Another

Light and Love

Kat x

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