There’s only so much one person can take. I had good feelings about today, I thought Wednesday 8th March is going to be a really good day. Turns out I was wrong. My day started with one of my twins screaming at me for no reason – my eyelids hadn’t even opened at this point. It’s spiralled into me having an anxiety attack and now I am in the middle of a black hole, questioning everything about my life right now. Followed by bad news and just feeling so exhausted. Sigh!
I have cried and cried and for the first time in a long time, I feel helpless. I don’t feel like the strong independent woman I thought I had become. Instead, I feel like the opposite! To gain what? It’s been a hard journey this past 2 years – 2 years ago yesterday, was the day it all ended with the girl’s dad. I know I have come far but at the same time, I also feel like I have failed. I have tried to take on too much and inevitably, things suffer. There’s only so much one person can take on and I have taken on too much.
Hopefully, a good night sleep and a fresh head tomorrow will help plus a good chat with my family should put things into perspective.